Start with what she already wears, not with the ring. Look at her jewellery for a week: the metal she reaches for, whether she likes one clear point of light or a little sparkle all round, and whether her rings are fine and slim or bold. Then make four choices in order: the shape of the stone, the setting, the metal and band, and the size. Get those right and the engagement ring will feel like hers from the first day.
The Shape of the Stone
The shape is the first thing anyone notices, so it carries most of the character. A round stone is the classic choice: it gives back the most light, suits every hand and sits easily beside a wedding band. An oval is the softer, longer cousin of the round, and it makes the finger look slimmer. A cushion is square with gently rounded corners, which gives it a vintage, pillowy look. A princess is a crisp square with sharp corners, for someone who likes clean, modern lines. A pear is round at one end and pointed at the other: unusual and graceful, and best for someone who enjoys a piece that is a little different.
If you are unsure, choose round. It is the shape most people picture when they think of an engagement ring, and it is the hardest to get wrong. A heart is the romantic exception: personal, and right only if she already wears hearts.
The Solitaire Engagement Ring
A solitaire is a single stone on a plain band, usually held by four or six small claws, called prongs. Prongs lift the stone and let light in from the sides, which is why a solitaire looks so bright. It is the simplest setting, and the one that sits most comfortably beside a wedding ring later.
Stroili's Gold-Plated Solitaire Ring holds a single round brilliant cubic zirconia in four prongs above a smooth gold-plated band. Its Sterling Silver Solitaire Ring sets an 8 mm round brilliant cubic zirconia in prongs on 925 sterling silver, for a clean, open profile. Pandora's 925 Sterling Silver Heart Ring places a heart-shaped stone on a slim beaded band.
Halo and Pavé: More Light Around the Stone
A halo is a ring of small stones around the centre stone. It makes the centre look larger and adds sparkle from every angle. A pavé band has small stones set close together along the band itself, like a paved path, so the ring catches the light even when the centre stone is turned away. Both suit someone who likes shine; both need a little more care than a plain band.
Stroili's Sterling Silver Flower Statement Ring frames a prong-set blue centre stone with clear stones in a flower shape, which is how a halo works. Pandora's Sterling Silver Signature Cubic Zirconia Ring sets a large clear cubic zirconia at the centre with smaller stones along the band. Stroili's Gold-Plated Solitaire Ring with stones along the band does the same in gold plating. Pandora's Silver Pavé Ring is the quieter option: a slim 925 sterling silver band with pavé-set blue stones and no centre stone at all.
- Sterling Silver Flower Statement Ring
- Sterling Silver Signature Cubic Zirconia Ring
- Gold-Plated Solitaire Ring
- Silver Pavé Ring
Three-Stone Rings
A three-stone ring sets three stones side by side, usually with the centre one equal to or larger than the others. It is often given to stand for past, present and future, and it covers more of the finger than a solitaire, so it suits a longer hand or someone who likes a ring with presence. A split band, where the band divides as it meets the stones, adds openness and keeps a wider design feeling light.
Stroili makes three versions in 925 sterling silver, each with three round brilliant cubic zirconia stones in four-prong settings on a split band: the Sterling Silver Ring, the Sterling Silver Solitaire Ring and the Sterling Silver Statement Ring.
Metal and Band Width
Match the metal to the jewellery she wears every day. If her watch, earrings and other rings are silver-toned, choose sterling silver or a white finish; if she wears warm tones, choose gold plating. Two-tone pieces suit someone who mixes both. The ring will be worn with everything she owns, so this matters more than it seems.
Band width changes the look as much as the stone. A slim band, around two millimetres, makes the stone look larger and suits small or slender hands. A wider band feels more substantial and suits larger hands or a bolder taste. If she will wear a wedding ring beside it, a slim band leaves room for both.
How to Find Her Ring Size Discreetly
The simplest way is to borrow a ring she already wears on her ring finger, ideally on the same hand. Measure the inside diameter in millimetres with a ruler, or draw round the inside on paper, then compare it with a ring size guide. If the ring you borrow is one she wears on another finger, allow for it, as fingers differ.
If you cannot borrow one, ask a close friend or family member, who may know her size or can find out without raising suspicion. Bear in mind that fingers are slightly larger in warm weather and in the evening, and that ring sizes are written differently from country to country, with letters in the United Kingdom and numbers in much of Europe. If you are between two sizes, the larger is usually the safer choice.
Choosing an Engagement Ring for Her Taste
The best guide is what she wears now. If her jewellery is romantic, with flowers, hearts or soft curves, a floral or heart engagement ring will feel natural. If she prefers clean lines, a solitaire or three-stone ring will suit her better. If she loves colour, a coloured centre stone or a band of coloured stones will be more her than a clear stone.
Pandora's Silver Floral Engagement Ring is silver with crystal detailing in a three-petal shape, and its Metal Floral Ring is an openwork band of linked flowers in silver-toned metal. Pandora's Silver Heart Ring sets clear cubic zirconia in a heart pattern. Stroili's Steel Crystal Fashion Ring is the modern choice, with alternating rows of blue and white crystals on a steel band.
Caring for an Engagement Ring
An engagement ring is worn every day, so a few habits help it keep its shine. Take it off before washing up, cleaning, swimming, exercise and applying hand cream or perfume. Wipe it with a soft, dry cloth after wearing, and store it on its own in a soft pouch or a lined box so the stones do not scratch other pieces. Plated and silver jewellery in particular are best kept away from water and chemicals, and silver can be brought back with a cloth made for polishing silver. Every so often, look closely at the prongs to check that the stone still sits firmly.
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